Club Friday Q&A: Chandan and Roop Singh of CBC's Bollywed
By Stacy Lee Kong
Image: Kyrani Kanavaros
For nearly four decades, Chandan Fashion has been one of the anchors of Toronto's Little India neighbourhood—and now the family behind the iconic bridal boutique is starring in Bollywed, a CBC docuseries about their business and their lives. But Say Yes to the Dress it is not. While the drama of helping a bride choose the perfect look for her big day is part of the show (obviously), the show is as much about the joy and, okay, challenges of running a business with your immigrant family, from old school vs. new school takes on marketing to making time to do things as a family. I chatted with son Chandan and daughter-in-law Roop Singh about how Bollywed came to be, meaningful representation and what they're most excited for people to see.
How did Bollywed even come to be?
Chandan: We've been doing Suhaag, which is one of the biggest wedding shows in North America, since the early 2000s. Around 2014, the executive producer of the show, Gurjeet, approached me with the idea for a show, and I said, “Hey, you know what, if you need a wedding dress show with a family, our family is perfect.” I remember seeing Say Yes to the Dress and thinking it was a great show because the stories were engaging. But, the brides were always picking between white dresses and when I'm looking at our clothes, there's way more vibrancy, detail, colour, embellishments, jewels, cuts. [I knew people would be interested because] I'd see people's reactions to our clothes. Remember, we're on Gerrard Street, so we don't get just one type of clientele—we have Caucasian people come in, Asian people, African-American people, Latin people, and they'd be gobsmacked at the colours and embellishments. And South Asian weddings were also becoming bigger and bigger and bigger.
So, Gurjeet came by a week later and we shot a sizzle. Then a year later, we met Carolyn [Meland] from HeartHat Entertainment, who did Brides of Beverly Hills. She and Gurjeet came on as partners and we shot a second sizzle. They shopped that around for five or six years and heard nothing. Or, all they heard was rejection—from Slice, HGTV, Omni TV, Crave. We got 22 rejections. At first, I'd get updates every six months and then every year. And every time I got a rejection email, I would get excited. It was so weird, but I was excited because it meant people were looking at it. Sometimes customers would tell me, 'Oh my god, you guys need a TV show!' and I'd show them the sizzle. I knew it was a matter of not if, but when.
Then, during the second COVID lockdown, I got a message from the producers asking if we were still interested in Bollywed because CBC was looking at it. We shot a third sizzle in December 2021 and in March 2022, we were green lit.
Tell me more about believing it wasn't a matter of if but when, because I feel like, especially when you're talking about racialized people telling stories about our communities, it requires so much convincing. The decision makers are often white people, so we have to prove to them that these stories matter, that audiences would be interested... How do you actually believe within yourself that someone's going to see that value?
Roop: I will attest to the fact that it was always when. We were dating throughout all those sizzles and he was just so confident with every rejection. He was like, 'It's gonna happen, it's gonna happen, someone's gonna realize how important our story is.'
Roop and Chandan Singh. (Image: CBC)
Chandan: I was born and raised in Toronto, and I went to a small, private high school. I want to say that my class had 20 people. My whole school had probably 200 or 300 people; it wasn't very big. And I was the only Punjabi person in my whole school—the only person who had a beard and wore a patka, the only one that looked like me. The only reason I was put in private school was to shelter me from racism; my dad's belief was that if he put me in a good school, he could protect me from racism. He could make sure that I kept my hair and my turban. That was the most important thing for my dad.
But I still faced racism, you know? I would never come home and tell my dad because I knew it would break his heart; he paid those monthly bills for private school when he couldn't afford to. But I went through that whole thing where I felt like I didn't belong with all of the rich kids. I was the outsider who couldn't afford to go to that school, but I was there, so there was a little bit of imposter syndrome. So, when we made the sizzles and I saw people of colour who look like me, and who had skin complexions that were darker, I just believed that it was so powerful. And it was bigger than me. It wasn't just about Chandan Fashion, it was about pushing for representation in this country. Because I know that there's going to be one kid that turns on the TV one day, flips through the channels and sees someone on screen that looks like them, and I knew how important that was. Because if I turned on the TV and saw someone who looked like me back then, it would have completely changed the trajectory of my life. I wouldn't have taken so long to be comfortable in my skin.
I totally get that. I grew up in a very white suburb and also took a long time to feel comfortable in my own skin. I'm curious about the reality TV angle, though—I know it's a docuseries, but it's still within the larger sphere of reality TV and a lot of times the drama gets ramped up to make sure there's a compelling narrative. I imagine you'd be particularly concerned about that if part of your goal is representation. Did anyone in the family have any concerns about how you'd be portrayed?
Chandan: We had our reservations. Sometimes brown people are portrayed as a comical figures, or it's about 'the vibrant, beautiful colour, so much colour, colour, colour,' and we wanted to be seen as more than that. At the end of the day we're a family that struggles day in and day out to have a successful business and we wanted that story to translate on top of the fashion, the colour, who wears a turban. So we were very happy when the producers constantly hammered home that they didn't want this to be another Say Yes to the Dress. In fact, they said we are not leaning into that, we're not going to make this another Say Yes to the Dress. It's going to be more about the family. It's going to be more about the struggles of being first-generation Canadian.
What was the actual filming process like? Or maybe my question is actually, how 'real' was it?
Chandan: That was the most difficult thing for us to wrap our heads around. For example, there's this one scene where I'm sitting down with mom and dad and going over a marketing strategy, which is something that we would do. But maybe not at that time of day where they asked us to shoot that scene. So that's where the narrative part comes into it. Or, then there's one scene where I'm explaining something to my parents, and [the producers] asked me to keep on explaining. They didn't tell me what was happening, they just said, 'Keep going, keep going.' And then dad started to fall asleep, because that's really my dad in any meeting. It happens at the bank, it happens at the car dealership. Anywhere where there's a lot of speaking.
Roop: If he's not the one doing the speaking, he falls asleep. A lot of people have been commenting and telling us that was just for show. They're like, 'There's no way that happened.' They thought it was orchestrated. But no, that was factual. In terms of the scenes or the days we spent filming, it seemed a little structured. However, I would say the overall trajectory of each episode, and the entire storyline for the season, was very authentic and very respectful. The producers sat us down multiple times throughout shooting and said, 'What is happening in your lives right now? What's important to you guys? What are the big milestones that you're looking to celebrate? What are you trying to achieve as a family?' And they wouldn't just ask me or Chandan or Chandni, but mom and dad as well. 'What are your dreams? What are your wishes and hopes? What do you like to do?' And then they built the episodes around that.
And I just want to backtrack to that question about how Chandan was so confident that somehow this store, this business, this family belonged on TV. I have to say, a good chunk of that is Chandan’s dad, my father-in-law. He has such a magnetic, charismatic personality. He belongs on TV. And I'm so proud of him that he did all 10 episodes and countless interviews, while being insecure about the language barrier. He had a night where he sat down with me, mom, Chandni and Chandan and said, 'You know, I'm only educated to grade 10 and I don't speak English like you do,' because mom's English is quite strong. He was a little nervous about it. But he never let it show. And he delivered. He just spoke from the heart.
We speak English in Trinidad, but my parents have accents. I don't really hear them, but other people sometimes say they're quite thick and sometimes you can see the conclusions people draw about their intelligence or their ability based on that, which I find really frustrating. So I think it might actually be really powerful for other parents, and other people, to see how smart and capable Chandan's dad is. Like, that accent doesn't mean what you think it means.
Roop: No, and intelligence isn't based on your ability to to speak this language.
Are there any particular moments that you're really happy people are going to get a chance to see?
Roop: There's so many, but I think one of the biggest is showing how inclusive we are, as a business, as a brand and as a family—and how inclusive we've been from day one. I love that that's something mom and dad have fostered within us. We've seen how they greet anyone who walks through our store; it doesn't matter their background, culture, colour, sexual orientation, none of it. A patron is a patron. Are you a paying client? Great, come on in. We will treat you all the same, and I love that. That's very beautifully showcased across the episodes, and kudos to our producers and directors for making sure of that.
Chandan: And that happens organically. It wasn't put on just for the show. For example, Chase from episode two is a buddy of mine. We went to university together and we've done plenty of collabs that had nothing to do with the show. And Priyanka and her family have been shopping at our store for 20 years, back when she didn't consider herself as part of the drag world. When she felt that she wanted to explore that route, before even speaking to her father, she came to my store to talk to my dad and ask for a sari or lengha. And my dad was like, 'Beti, let's go for it.' And he didn't say beta, he said beti, you know? I didn't even know that happened until she tagged us on Instagram.
Roop: And that's about dad's emotional intelligence. He might not speak the language perfectly, but he's showing us all how to be better people. He's setting an example for all of us without even thinking twice about it.
I especially love seeing that included because there's so much more diversity of thought within our communities, and especially among our elders, than what sometimes gets portrayed. The idea is always that our parents or grandparents, or aunts and uncles are so conservative and we're the ones who have to teach them how to be more inclusive or how to be more equitable. But that's not always the case. Speaking of communities, what has reaction been like to the show, both within your community and outside of it?
Chandan: Can I be honest? I have gotten such amazing support from non-South Asian communities. I'm hearing from Caucasian people in B.C., Montreal, Winnipeg, Halifax, Whitehorse, the States—just all over. And I did know the show would be really interesting to non-South Asian populations who have never seen this world before, and who were curious what it's like to have an Indian wedding, what's it like inside an Indian family, what's it like inside this Indian bridal boutique.
But I thought I was making something that would make the South Asian community proud, too, and they have been quieter. Our inner circle, our friends and family, our closest vendors and clients have all been very supportive, but I've also had to DM and message so many people in our own industry to ask if they could share it with their friends and families, or on their social media feeds. One of our vendors said it's that crowd mentality; people get jealous seeing other people doing well. And that really broke my heart. I'm still wrapping my head around that.
I can definitely understand how disappointing that would be. Though I do think sometimes you make an impact without realizing it—and there are definitely people who are so happy to see a family that looks like theirs on their TV screens, even though you may not be hearing about them. What are you hoping the show accomplishes?
Chandan: I hope people will look at the bigger picture of the show. I've always wanted to create a legacy—I've never chased after money, but that is something that I do think is really cool and important to leave behind. And it's not even just my legacy. I really want dad's legacy to shine. He's given me everything in the world when he couldn't even afford it. We couldn't afford the the toys, the education, we never had family vacations. So, I think it's really important that I build his legacy, which is that iconic little shop that he started here in Little India. If I can make this into something that's a bit more national and global, I'll feel like mission accomplished.
Roop: If there are future seasons, I would genuinely love to share more of these topics that concern not just our community, but communities in general, and especially women. There are so many topics that I wish we had time to cover, other than just the inclusivity. In one episode, I'm doing a bridal fitting with a stunning, gorgeous brown woman who actually fell apart into tears because she thought she couldn't wear certain colours because she was dark skinned. That kind of stuff makes my blood boil. But, I love that we're able to share those things with the community, because sometimes we think we're so beyond all of that.
Weddings are actually the perfect way to explore things like that, though. We can pretend that we have progressed so much, but weddings have all of this tradition and emotion and stress.
Roop: And money. Money brings out the truth.
Yes! And then all of these hidden beliefs come to the surface. Weddings are like food, I think. They're such an interesting lens to look at what we actually believe.
Roop: Yes! I think that's why we end up looking into so many realities on our bridal floor, which makes it an interesting place to work—and hopefully, to make a difference.
Stream Bollywed now on CBC Gem.
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